Review of Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li
I know this is way late, but I have never seen the movie before and because I had heard the reviews were, well, less than stellar there was no way I would spend my money to see it in theaters or rent it. Christ, what the fuck?! This is beyond garbage. Who in their right mind read this shitty script and went, “YES! Let us make this toot suite!”
I watched both the theatrical and unrated versions and the special features, and this movie really had no saving grace. Here is a list of the pros and cons:
- It was actually greenlit, congrats.
- Michael Clark Duncan made a good Balrog I guess.
- Kristin Kreuk was an okay Chun-Li, but would have been better if she didn’t deliver every line so blandly.
- WTF, it was actually greenlit.
- Since when is M. Bison Irish? More importantly, if he was orphaned as an infant and raised in Bangkok, why does he keep slipping into an Irish accent? He was around zero Irishmen.
- Who thought Chris Klein would be a good choice in any movie? He looked like a fucking psycho.
- Vega is supposed to be this gorgeous Spanish caged fighter that everyone woman wants to fuck and wears the mask to protect his beautiful face. With that said, why would they cast Taboo from the Black Eyed Peas?
- Too much voice over. Newsflash: nothing screams garbage story than when they have to cover your shitty work with even worse voice overs.
- The fight scenes weren’t even that impressive. Yeah some of it was cool, but the iconic moves that you identify the characters with either weren’t there or were poorly done (the spinning bird kick in the nightclub was just sad, and her fireball at the end ridiculous).
- The directing and pacing were just atrocious, to the point that it actually hurt my head.
- If you don’t know who to use CG correctly then DO NOT use it at all. In the scene where Chun Li is playing the piano in the concert hall you are clearly able to tell that she is sitting in front of a green screen. That’s not even the bad part- the bad part was the fact that when she would turn her head, her hair would be cut out of the scene, like part of her head is missing.
- Acting, I understand, can be hard, but all acting is is lying. Acting is just getting someone to believe that what you are saying or doing to be true, and not a single person in this movie was capable of this (especially Chris Klein.)
- Every single person in this movie sounds as if they are from North America. Yes, I know that they are, but some of these characters are supposed to have been born and raised in Bangkok (Moon Bloodgood’s Detective Maya Sunee).
I found it quite humorous that every one of the actors in the special features praised this movie, and said that they had so much fun making it and that it was such a great experience. I understand that it’s your job to talk up your current project, but Neal McDonough went as far to say that he was most proud of his work in this movie. Really?! So Band of Brothers was just a speed bump on the way to the cinematic masterpiece that was Street Fighter: Legend of Chun-Li?
Chun-Li screenwriter Justin Marks stated in the extra features when describing the titular Street Fighter character; “Chun-Li is a modern day girl of her own.” WTF does that even mean you asshole? You are not allowed to talk anymore. I forbid it, because your an ass and a piss poor screenwriter.
The screenplay was full of holes, to the point that either someone owed Mr. Marks a favor or he performed a couple of favors of his own. This movie was so loosely based on Street Fighter that it shouldn’t have even had Street Fighter in the title. This was actually far worse than the abomination that was WANTED, a great comic and completely ruined movie that didn’t follow anything of the comic except, like, four of the characters. The only saving grace for WANTED was the star power they acquired. All Chun-Li was able to muster was Kristin Kreuk and Chris Klein?
All in all the movie wasn’t bad- it was horrible. So horrible that it should have never been released in theaters, on DVD, or VOD (videos on demand). I’m giving it .5 stars out of 5.